Peeing during sex is NEVER SEXY! It’s embarrassing, messy, nothing like squirting and a major boner killer. So, what actually causes peeing during sex and is there a natural solution for this embarrassing dilemma?
What Causes Peeing During Sex?
First, let’s look at how the body controls your pee and how it stops your bladder from leaking like a faucet.
The pelvic floor muscles acts as the main control of everything down there. It helps you keep your pee and poop in and even plays a part in the vaginal tightness and your “grip” during sex. Over time, just like everything else, those pelvic muscles undergo a wear and tear process and becomes weak. This weakened set of muscles down there could cause you to leak every time your orgasm, have sex, sneeze, cough or even laugh!
There are 2 types of coital incontinence or peeing during sex: urination with penetration and urination with orgasm.
Urination during penetration is exactly what it sounds like. It happens the moment something is inserted into your vagina and your bladder or urethra feels some pressure being exerted into it. This happens because your pelvic floor muscles are not strong enough to keep the urine in.
Urination during orgasm happens when the muscles in your bladder are experiencing uncontrollable spasms. This is also called an over active bladder or OAB. Just like urination during penetration, urination during orgasms also occur because of your weakened pelvic floor muscles.
The first thing that you SHOULD do when you experience urinary incontinence is to consult with your doctor. Yes, the thought of going to someone to tell them that you pee during sex is embarrassing at first, but you have to remember that seeing your doctor will help to accurately diagnose your condition and the cause of it. Your doctor will help your make an effective treatment plan and could also refer you to a urogynecologist who specializes in women who have the same problems as you.
Kegel exercises may not work instantly like magic, but it will help kick start your way to recovery. Just like all the exercises, it will help strengthen your targeted muscles, which in this case, is your pelvic floor muscles. In doing the kegel exercises, be sure that you are doing it correctly, because no matter how much you do it, if you do it wrong, it will be all for nothing.
In order to correctly perform the kegels, you have to:
Locate the pelvic muscles; those are the muscles that you use if you want to stop urination midstream.
Then, squeeze those muscles for about 5 seconds.
Relax for 5 seconds.
Repeat for at least 5 times per session and 3 sessions a day
You can also use kegel balls or ben wa balls to act as a weight during your exercise.
One of the most common reasons why you are experiencing urinary incontinence might be due to the lack of estrogen in your body. Estrogen is the one that helps in maintaining the health of your sexual organs and keeping the pelvic floor muscles strong and healthy.
As a woman grows older, gives birth, or undergoes surgery, the body will also produce less and less estrogen. With not enough estrogen in the system, there will also be nothing to maintain your sexual health and pelvic floor strength. This will cause vaginal loosening, urinary incontinence and even a decrease or absence in sex drive.
Luckily, you can still take phytoestrogen, which are the safest estrogen that you can take and are made by plants. Kacip Fatimah is an herb that contains high quality phytoestrogen to help you strengthen your pelvic floor muscles and avoid the embarrassing peeing during intimate time with your partner.
How to Manage Incontinence During Sex
Peeing during the most intimate moments with your partner is embarrassing and off-puting, so while you are on your way to recovery, is there a way to manage incontinence during sex?
Communicate with your partner
Incontinence itself is a very embarrassing topic. Communicating with your partner is the most important part of the relationship, especially when you are facing such a serious and embarrassing problem. Tell your partner how you feel and why you have been shy when it comes to the bedroom lately.
Avoid fluids before sex
Try to avoid any drinks an hour before sex especially those that could irritate your bladder and aggravate your incontinence. You should stay hydrated all throughout the day and just stop taking fluids an hour before your intimate time.
Urinate before your intimate time
Emptying your bladder before having sex lessens your chances of leaking. If there’s nothing in your bladder, there’s also nothing to leak. Try the double voiding method where you urinate, relax your bladder fully and then urinate again to make sure that you pee out as much as you can.
Try new sexual positions
Some sex positions like the missionary could put more pressure on the bladder, hence, increasing your chances of peeing while in the heat of the moment. You can try being on top to give you more control of your pelvic muscles and decreasing the pressure that is placed on your bladder. It’s also a great way to hit your g-spot. Another position that you can try is penetration from behind which puts less strain on your bladder and urethra. Try to be creative with your partner, you might find your new favorite position!
Take a bathroom break
The moment you feel the urge to pee while in the heat of the moment, don’t be embarrassed to call a time out and take a bathroom break.
Urinary incontinence or peeing during sex is a common condition for women everywhere, of all ages. With the help of these helpful tips, you can live a healthy sexual life, without the fear of peeing every time you have sex!