Sex might not be the most important part of a relationship but it sure holds it together like glue! It should be done with consent, love and of course, no one should be in pain while in the act of love making. You have to keep in mind that intercourse should NEVER be painful. What exactly causes painful intercourse and can you avoid it?

Painful intercourse could be caused by a number of factors and could affect different areas of your vagina. The best way to know how to treat it is to determine the root of the problem, there are two types of pain: the surface pain and deep pain.



Surface Pain

The most common cause of pain comes from the surface or the outermost part of the vagina that comes in contact during sex. Surface pain is usually caused by vaginal dryness brought about by an unhealthy mucousal layer of the vagina.


vagina layers


The vagina is made up of a number of layers, the innermost is the adventitia, which keeps the vagina in place and anchors it in place. Next is the muscle layer which keeps the vagina toned and tight. The outermost layer or the mucosal layer is the one that comes in contact during intercourse.




Estrogen keeps all the layers healthy and in top condition, but as we all grow older,the body will also lessen its production of estrogen. Without it, the muscle layer of your vagina will weaken, causing a vaginal loosening. Lack of estrogen will also cause a thinning of the mucosal layer, which means that it will be more susceptible to dryness and injury.

Also Read: Healthy and Natural Ways to Tighten the Vagina



Solution for surface pain

Since the cause of the surface pain is vaginal dryness, the best way to fight it is by restoring the health of your vagina.  You can do this by increasing the amount of estrogen your body. In order to achieve that, you can take phytoestrogen, which are the safe estrogen made by plants. They are all natural and have no side effects. You can get some high quality phytoestrogen from




Just remember that not all foods with phytoestrogen are the same, some like soy, don’t have enough phytoestrogen to help the body heal and regain the vaginal moisture. You should take herbs that are rich in high quality phytoestrogen such as Kacip Fatimah, that way, you are sure that your body has the right phytoestrogen that it needs to fight away vaginal dryness.

Another way to temporary alleviate your vaginal dryness and your pain during sex is by using water based lubricant during your intimate time. Just be sure that is it natural, water-based and hypoallergenic to avoid further damage to your vaginal canal.

You and your partner could also try increase the amount and time of foreplay to get things ready down there before intercourse and to relax you.

Also Read: 5 Simple Rules to Keep Your Vagina Healthy


Deep pain

Another kind of vaginal pain during intercourse is deep pain which originates from somewhere deeper than the vaginal walls. It’s often caused by underlying cause.

The common causes of deep pain include:

  • Growth in the ovaries
  • Endometriosos
  • Genital infection
  • Pelvic infection
  • Vaginal inflammation
  • Inflammation of the vulva
  • Pelvic inflammatory disease
  • UTI
  • Inflammation of the bladder
  • STD’s such as gonorrhoea, chlamydia, herpic sores, and genital warts.



Solution for deep pain

The best solution for deep pain is to see your doctor as soon as you can. The treatment will depend on the underlying condition for your pain. Your doctor could accurately diagnose your condition and pinpoint the cause of your pain.

For STD related pain, our doctor will prescribe medications depending on the STD. For chronic inflammation, the doctor will usually prescribe anti-inflamatory medications to ease the symptoms or suggest bladder washing and electric simulation.

If all else fails, or during serious causes of deep internal pain, your doctor might recommend surgery to alleviate the pain.




Pain during intercourse is not normal at all! Sex is something that should be enjoyed by both consenting adults and there should be zero pain at all. It’s usually caused by a number of factors, the most important part in making sure that you are comfortable all the time is by taking care of your vaginal health. Just remember, the healthier your sexual organs are, the less risk you’ll have in having pain during intercourse.